Running an outsourcing business usually means convincing prospects that outsourcing is the way to go.

But, crafting a message that stands out in your leads’ inboxes and makes them realize they need your solution often ends up in self-centerd or salesy pitches.

So, how do you ensure your cold email resonates with your target audience and actually gets replies?

Check out how Tristan, Co-Founder of Stepward outbound agency, turned a low-performing email into one that captivates and converts leads!

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Cold email mistakes to avoid

Here’s a cold email targeting decision makers at SMBs in the UK to help them boost efficiency by outsourcing their efforts

Here’s what stops prospects from replying to this cold email:

Mistake #1: It’s self-centered

If you want to trigger prospects’ attention and show your interest in them – you have to speak about them. Your prospects don’t care about you but they can be interested in how they can benefit.

Mistake #2: Very vague personalization

Just by mentioning prospects’ location and company, you won’t truly differentiate from other generic emails. Instead, use personalization linked to the email topic and your prospects’ business.

Mistake #3: Negative tone

Avoid negative connotations, and don’t use triggers like “you find my voice annoying”. Even though it can be funny, focus on positive jokes.

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How to write a cold email for a high conversion rate

Here’s how Tristan would rewrite this cold email to help you sign more deals with decision makers

What tips can you replicate from this email for more replies?

Tip #1: Use an intriguing subject line

Mentioning your leads’ desired outcome in the subject line will push your target audience to open your email and read the rest of your email. Since they are looking for a new workforce, applying to a job offer with a twist can push your open rates.

Tip #2: Mention prospects’ pain points

If you show your prospects that you know their pain points, they will feel understood and will be more willing to answer with you. When there is a clear mutual agreement, it means it will be easy to move forward together down the sales funnel.

Tip #3: Add valuable personalization

Show a natural and human approach by adding personalization that isn’t just fluff, but adds a true value. This is how you prove you put time and effort into researching your prospects and, therefore, you care to help them.

Tip #4: Mention concise benefits specific to your reader

Present all key advantages for the specific target persona you’re talking to as the solution to the pain points from the intro line.

Tip #5: Add no-brainer CTA

Use easy-to-answer questions. In this example, the lead just needs to answer “yes” in order to start a conversation and get the value!

If you need some more inspo for CTAs, we’ve got you covered.

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Cold email template to replicate for more replies

Subject line: Application – {{job title}}

Hello {{firstName}},


I noticed your {{job title}} position has been listed on Welcome to the Jungle for {{number of weeks}} now. Still searching for the right fit?


We recently helped {{same sector company}} place a {{job title}}, saving their CEO both time and money in the recruitment process for a hard-to-find role.


With outstaffing, you can easily delegate less critical tasks like {{tasks}} to specialized agents, handpicked by you. This approach is three times more cost-effective than traditional hiring, and we can make it happen in under two weeks.


I’ve already identified some profiles that align with your needs based on your offer. Would you like me to present them to you?

Best,

{{signature}}

Don’t forget you can easily and quickly generate the perfect signature for all your cold emails.

Key takeaways

Here are Tristan’s key cold email strategies for sealing deals with SMB’s decision-makers:

-> Focus on the prospect’s needs and pain points, not your offer
-> Personalization should be meaningful and linked to the email’s context
-> Maintain a positive tone and avoid negative connotations
-> Craft a clear CTA that requires minimal effort for a response

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Check out Tristan’s full cold email teardown!

‍PS: Want more tips? Request outbound experts to review your cold emails here.